Statement of Jay Fisette

Stand Up For Equality Rally
Fairfax County Government Center

June 30, 2004

My name is Jay Fisette.

I am male. I have white skin. I have brown hair. I am right-handed.

And I am gay. None by choice. All by nature.

And I am tired.

I am tired of don’t ask don’t tell.

I am tired of being encouraged to be dishonest about who I am.

I am tired of a double standard, that interprets my honesty as flaunting it or wearing it on my sleeve.

I am tired of having my equal rights dismissed as being special rights.

I am tired of ignorant legislators and of spineless legislators making bad laws that drive my friends to other states, that put at risk the rights I paid an attorney to get, and that make me out to be less than someone else.

I am tired of legislators coming to our parties and yukking it up at night, then voting against my family the next day.

I am tired of hearing the Bible used as a weapon of fear….in exactly the same way it was used to justify discrimination 50 years ago.

I am tired of a state who’s civil rights record is an embarrassment – with massive resistance to racial equality, interracial marriage, immigrant rights, and gay and lesbian rights.

I am tired of this President telling me that my 21 year relationship is a threat to his marriage.

I am tired…but more than tired…I am angry.

With HB 751, Virginia’s evangelical conservatives stepped way over the line. Their attempt to humiliate us and create a 2nd class citizenship is motivated by ignorance at best and by pure meanness and political calculation at worst.

What can we do to ensure equality in Virginia?

First - and I mean this literally - if you are gay or lesbian, come out. This is the best way to educate family, friends, colleagues and decision-makers. Sadly, we are often our own worst enemy. Until we are proud of ourselves, how can we ask others to invest in us? Your legislators in Fairfax, Prince William and Loudoun have to know you are there first…face to face.

Second, if you are straight, speak out. Don’t tolerate anti-gay comments.

Third, join Equality Virginia - and your local groups - and its community action teams. Give what you can of your time and your funds. The commitment must extend beyond today. Become a constructive and visible presence in YOUR community.

Finally, VOTE. To be gay or lesbian in the year 2004 is to be political. Not by choice - but for our survival. We have been thrust into this as the whipping post, the wedge issue, and the fundraising scare tactic of political opportunists for too long.

We are a gentle loving people who have become a gentle angry people. We want and deserve a state that respects and celebrates our differences and supports equality for all its residents. You will help make this state a better place for everyone.

Thank you for being here today.